I am a numbers-analyzing machine .. thas what I do, I base decisions on numbers. There is a decent amount of understanding and thinking before getting to the numbers, but at the end, I base my decisions on a number.

That is my profession, or what I study ... and I refuse to base my life's decisions on possibilities and numbers .. I just refuse to use the same logic that I use in my propulsion hw in life. May be it is the most sane logic, but I can't. I have seen engineers. I have seen how they work ... and life just doesn't work that way. They make numbers fit to what they want them to be, they always look for the best package. They have to consider everything all at once ... I dunno .. in life .. somethings weigh a lot more than others ...

As I am semi-profissional-nerd I would qoute John Nash's acceptance speech from the movie (beautifull minds). I say from the movie, because in reality he didn't give that speech. I researched it, and in fact, he wasn't even invited to give a seminar like all the other winners!

"I’ve always believed in numbers, in the equations and logics that lead to reasons. but after a life time of such pursuit, I ask what truly is logic ... who decide reason. My quest has taken me through the physical, metaphysical, and delusional worlds and back. And I have made the most important discovery of my career … the most important discovery of my life. It is only in the mysterious equations of life that analogical reasons can be found. I am only here tonight because of you. You are the reason I am ... you are all my reasons.

Thank you"